On Relationships

Relationships are very delicate things. In fact, they are so finely balanced it's a wonder that they exist at all. One such balance is about neediness. On one paw, being too needy will creep the other out. Like, say, wanting to do the exact same thing at the same time. On the other paw, being patently un-needy is just going to introduce distance into the relationship. Between the two, it can be difficult to gauge. There is a lot of probing to understand where the other stands on this issue. Perhaps going a step further to see where it goes, then hurriedly backing off when the other shows signs of unhappiness. The process is repeated until the other's personality is well understood.

Sounds like a lot, but that's just one balance point amongst many. Variables within variables within variables. When someone says that relationships are a lot of work, chances are that they are. There are a whole bunch of variables to compute, and it doesn't help that people change over time. It is remarkable, the amount of effort people put into keeping relationships healthy. Sometimes I wonder if it is also the strain of maintaining relationships that makes people cut themselves off from other less significant relationships.

I hear that cortex cells go into growth overdrive during puberty, and that neural pathways are being refined at that time. If the pathways were not established properly, the cells degenerate and I guess that causes personality changes. Theoretically, someone who is constantly illogical during puberty would grow up to be an illogical person because logic cells fry themselves (if such a thing actually happened). Perhaps the same thing happens to relationship cells?