Great Friends

Sometimes, help can come from the most unexpected of places. I seem to be guided at every turn. Some friend mentions a particular event and suddenly I check and find that there's a fatal error in one of my plans. Or perhaps another friend pops out of the woodwork and then I'm like whoa! I haven't seen you in like *ages!*

One of the things I feel blessed with is having great friends. Friends who accept me for who I am, rather than what I am in relation to internalized social expectations. Nobody's perfect, and they aren't pretending to themselves that I am and that I am somehow obligated to stick to those ideals. I guess that's why they became friends in the first place. Then again, I tend to attract those who were misfits at some time, and for various reasons. While this may sound like a motley crew, and not quite glamorous, misfits are forced not to take for granted the acceptance of people in general. It probably fosters the ability to empathize with how bad things can get when one is in a very real danger of being spat on at every turn. Anyway, Thanks, Guys!

My Long Weekend

The hols are ending. I call the hols my long weekend because...they are essentially one massive long weekend! There is precious little we can remember achieving in life, precisely because we do not take note of what we have achieved. It seems so much more tangible to have that bunch of A's at the end of the semester, or the $2000 paycheck at the end of the month. It is harder to accurately recall that you had breakfast at 9am, chatted online till 10am, played a game till 12, had lunch and so on. If you threw 50 hours into drawing classes and never produced a masterpiece you kept or an "graduation" certificate, it seems to others that, perhaps, it never really happened.

Hence, I shall keep an event log for the next big hol. I want a full accounting of what I have done, and what I have not. For this one, I did lots of reading (titles, Fenris?) writing (where's the full work?) chatting (that's a given) but haven't learned how to play the keyboard (yes, yes...since a year back). Now, I wonder...was that really all I did? (Yeah, Fenris. Was it?)

The Burden Of Knowledge

At the moment, genetic testing is not a valid way to segregate people. This is because genetic markers are not reliably confirmed. However, once these genetic markers are able to be reliably verified, some have expressed concern that the markers would be used to discriminate against people in work, insurance and other relevant areas. Of course, there are the ever-present optimists who believe that the goodness in humanity would prevail and people would not be discriminated against because of something they were born into rather than something that is within their ability to change.

I would be more skeptical on possible goodness coming from the burden of knowledge. After all, people discriminating against others on the basis of something that's not within their control? One need only look towards the cases where people were born into slavery, a certain race or even into a certain sex. Yes, it may seem hardly fair, but massive discrimination may follow on the heels of the cure for cancer.

Being Sick

Sickness hits me in weird ways. Last night, I was developing one helluva problem. Head felt like there was a rock concert going on inside, fever brewing and generally felt weak all over. Not to mention an infernal stuffed up feeling and ringing in the ears. So I took the vitamins, some headache meds and then went to pass out early. Turns out I feel right as rain today. Seems my body has a habit of getting sick for a day and leaving things at that.

Death Of A Fish

Wet markets are one thing. Seeing fish jumping at a supermarket is another. Now, it's interesting to watch the fishmonger at the supermarket catching fish with a net and dumping them on the ice. It's something else watching hypothermia and asphyxia set in. At first, the first is flapping on the ice, apparently short of breath and struggling a bit. After some time, if the fishmonger hasn't already stunned or cut it up, it starts to lie still. Hypothermia sets in, triggering a violent convulsion. The fish curls up in a spasm, tail rapidly flicking against the ice. Sometimes, it's possible to see the life literally leave the fish, as the body slowly lies still once more.

Of course, the other alternative isn't much better. While the fish is still struggling to breathe, the fishmonger cheerfully brings a cleaver to its gills and tears into its insides. After finding the nice delicate bits, the fishmonger yanked them out and chopped them off. Then water is poured over the fish to rinse off the excess blood and innards. Yummy.

An Emptiness In My Sawdust

Sometimes I feel a hollowness in my self. It's like being a doll that does not have enough stuffing. Why would someone feel incomplete when there is nothing to complete? After all, if one knows one's limitations and what one never had, one should cease to desire it. It's impossible to obtain. Still, one cannot help but know there will be something out there to fill the emptiness to overflowing.

A Broken Nipple

I was puzzled at why one of the keys on my keyboard seemed to have sunk in. Worst of all, it was my spacebar. After lifting the key from the keyboard, everything appeared to be in order. I could not discern any missing parts and such. It was only upon close examination that I found that the silicone nipple under the spacebar had broken and thus lost a significant bit of elasticity. I then set about thinking about how I could get a replacement. It seemed terrible to send the keyboard in for servicing: It'd take days at least. Sending it to the shop seemed a poor choice, since it would only cost me a sum to service. After teetering at the brink of deciding to buy myself a new keyboard, I realized that I could simply replace the nipple with another one from one of the keys. But which one? A quick mental check revealed the most likely candidate: The scroll lock key. I prised it from the keyboard and did the swap. Thanks to you, scroll lock, I am able to type this today. Your sacrifice was not in vain.

Sex And Ethics

On the surface, "Eastern" people are conservative and not very open about sex. "Western" people are open-minded and liberal about sex. How does this correlate to the birth rate and population? Clearly, people who are "conservative" like sex more. They have more babies. Perhaps it is just more exciting to do stuff in secret, knowing well and good that it's just horribly taboo. I guess it excites some people. It obviously excited those Easterners enough for them to reproduce like rabbits.

A Rolling Furball

I was enroute to the bus stop today when I came across this black cat. She saw me approach, then promptly flopped on her side and started rolling around. I found this interesting, but walked on since I was trying to get to an event. However, I remembered that I had my camera with me and wanted to film her in action. After she saw me returning, she did the whole rolling over thing again, but got suspicious when I started reaching in my pack for the camera. It's a pity, or I'd have yet another vid to remember her by.

Black And White 2

B&W 2 is a strange game. It is both something I hate and love. For one, I adore city building. It's nice watching a city grow from its very beginning. But then it's not terribly nice having to raise armies to fight off this attack and that while enduring some fairly meaningless quests just so you can unlock buildings. I know it makes the game feel more substantial, but it certainly adds a nice spadeful of tedium to the overall process. Something can be done about this, methinks.

Aged Activism

It would seem strange that people gradually lose their urge to change the world. I think it is somewhere around the 30's, when some sort of switch is flicked. I cannot be sure whether it is because of a perceived "adult" responsibility to the inner circle, or whether people just lose their drive. Perhaps it is a combination of both. Yet there are some who do manage to raise families whilst doing their bit for what they believe in. And yes, something that does not revolve around selves or families. I guess it is naivety, that some still believe that they can change things as individuals. Yet I cannot help but feel that it is perhaps the naive assumption of disempowerment that really keeps everything at the status quo, nasty though it may be

Labour And Machines

Perhaps that is how the world of tomorrow would be: Machines doing all the work that people shouldn't be forced to do. Automated logging and movement of goods. Taxis without drivers. All the people have to do is think up ways to make better machines that handle more of the work. But as the prophets of yesteryear have failed to predict, that has never and would probably never come to pass.

Humans are a blend of logic and emotion. It is probably this blend that keeps them human. Too much logic and some claim that they become mechanical, almost like the machines. Too much emotion and they become animals, ruled entirely by their feelings and urges. So, in a world where logic reigns supreme, perhaps it is not a stretch to think that labour is being performed by automatons. What is surprising would be that the automatons were once human.

Dreamfall And Lain

I just completed Dreamfall, and can't help but love the tracks by Magnet... They really made me cry, given how apt they were to certain really touching scenes in the game. I know that on principle the game isn't exactly the greatest. I mean it's short and the navigation isn't exactly very good. However, it appeals to me at every turn. It's got sci fi and fantasy. It's got a lonely girl who's able to shift between realities of sorts. It's got an overall tragic ending. It's got a crow.

And that's where Lain comes in. Most who have watched Lain would already understand the significance of the crow. Lain's ending is pretty much bittersweet just as is Dreamfall's. Shifting between realities is a central theme in both. Lonely girl is a character I can relate to and both protagonists aren't exactly very social. Of course, being able to blend both sci-fi and fantasy in a single package is great. Pity Lain didn't really get into that.

Dreamfall reminds me of the fine lines between dreams and reality, and how "dreams" may affect reality at some fundamental level. Pretty much like how Lain's presence on the Wired ("dream" world) is affecting reality just as Zoe's affecting the real world by presence on the dreamscape and the static on the Wire. Two very technologically advanced societies! Strangely enough, both Lain and Zoe don't really know who their mothers are, and there's the distinct possibility that they're sort of artificial constructs produced by megacorps. Interesting. Moreover, there's a girl that died and got stuck on the Wire(d) in both stories...

Of course, accessing the dreams also reminds me of something I've lost, or feel that I've lost. It feels like I have lost the ability to "shift", metaphorically speaking. Not at will anyway. I guess these are some things that really make me gravitate to things like Lain and Dreamfall.

On Dreamfall

The thing about Dreamfall is that it is annoying linear. That is, there are those sneak around scenes that just break the flow of the game, seeing as you can't really fight to defeat the enemies and you don't actually get anything if you can and do. Moreover, I miss the freedom to go around exploring, playing with stuff and doing subquests.

Strangely enough, that is precisely what is appealing about the game. They've eliminated the possibility of getting lost, having to cleave through countless enemies and having to be a rare weapons collector just to stay alive longer. Truly, it's nice to play a game that does not revolve
around combat for a change. Actually, the combat pretty much feels out of place,
given how they're all easy and simplistic. It'd probably be better to automate the
tussles, but that would make players feel that they have no real stake in the action.

Ume Wine

Ume wine is an interesting sort of alcohol. While it may have 15% alcohol (that's stronger than most grape wines), it does not have the nasty aftertaste or bitterness of just about every other alcoholic beverage I've tried so far. Of course, it's nice having those umes in the wine as well. I care not whether they grant it any sort of improved flavour, but they sure taste good steeped in alky.

The Worlds

Perhaps there is a reason for the ancient
worlds to look so odd. It is precisely
because they are ancient, or rather that
they are new. Worlds that have been
around for times start changing, becoming
more orderly, in a fashion. I guess worlds
look like that when they are through the
Destruction, yet are again able to support life.

In the beginning, there was chance. Out of nothingness, choices were made. From choices there became possibilities. Thus formed the varied realities. Each reality springing forth from a single origin, and every reality as real as any other. However, it was such that the realities were made unreal to one another, that they would not intermingle.