Decisiveness

If ever there was a regret in my life, I would say that it was a lack of decisiveness. I am too indecisive, so much so that I had actually let outside forces hold the reins when I should have pulled them myself. I have learned a new thing, but the problem would be that too many things had been done that are irreversible. Too many discourses are going on inside my head, full of "What-ifs" and their insidious ilk. Very bad for mental stability. I feel that there is no point trying to tell this to anyone else, since one who is content to "go with the flow" would likely be disinclined to heed the words. Besides, there is always a possibility that going with the flow would turn out swimmingly without personal intervention. I guess the lyric "You don't know what you've got till it's gone" would be rather apt in this context. At this moment, one cannot conceivably turn the clock back and so one can only go forward in time. It's much better to not have to look back with regret though it may be part and parcel of life. Wise words and reality are hard to reconcile. Yeah sure. Someone could go like accept the facts of life and bla bla. How many can accept that at an intellectual level at least? And would believing in something like that for the sake of happiness constitute being true to oneself?

A Fenrisian question: If you had been given a choice to be reborn without the pet peeve, would you take that chance? And if you did, did you just choose to sacrifice what you are now? Self and choice. If a problem were made to have never existed at all, one would never have thought of this in the first place. Ignorance would probably be bliss, but consciously choosing ignorance for the sake of bliss would be a form of self-betrayal. Or would being "happy" be the greatest thing one can bestow upon oneself, whether the happiness is born of ignorance or closure...